i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
