Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
he shaved USA in his pubs
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Terrible idea I love it
he just fucked me for my cheese.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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