Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
