is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
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think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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