i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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