I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize