Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize
