I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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