Do you still have your period?
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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