at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Will you blow on my dice?
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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