So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
