Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
