We're like a lot better than the average bears
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
