A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
