I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
