The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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