you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
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