i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
