let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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