Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
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