I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Randomize
