More tranny stories later!
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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