brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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