On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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