He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
