Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize