it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
All I want is dick and wine.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
