he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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