Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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