Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
