dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
