Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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