your thong is hanging out like whoa
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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