I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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