Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
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