what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
They have beer where we have blood.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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