Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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