I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
