at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize