i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
