4 words: hood of his car
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
