is wine microwaveable?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
