You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
My Higher Power is John Stamos
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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