She is in my trunk
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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