put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize