Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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