Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
