Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
