Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
She told me I should be a condom model.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
