what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
