exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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